Disclaimer –
Derek's work has been registered at the U.S. Library of Congress, so it would be a terrible financial idea to plagiarize or use any of the material found on this website for your own purposes. Nevertheless, enjoy the writing!pannychous: to become a carpenter solely because you can vomit caulk (Mitch)
pawleekarpick: the slut of all fruit trees it bears fruit many times every night for a different farmer and has no self-respect for itself because of a daddy complex (Domo)
pesade : to carry around your baby like a football, occasionally passing it off to strangers to see if they'll run with it or not (Derek)
petasus: a remote-control bush (Will)
philater: a device used to loosen up the clump of dead people in my cave…my cave of Dead People (Bryan)
pintle: the raised bumps in an infant's forehead that compliment the indentations on the golf ball that left them (Eric R)
pizzle: a trap that's nearly impossible to get caught in because it involves being 6000 degrees at the time of capture (Derek)
pleach: a person who latches onto barnacles "to return the favor" (Aimee)
plimsoll: a fruit with radioactive pit and paralyzing spikes. It's very difficult to eat, but as they say, "What doesn't kill you makes you radioactive and paralyzed" (Eric R)
plumbago: a medical deficiency in bones; i.e. less than three (Derek)
plumbum (1): an alarm clock that only tells you when it's not time to wake up (Corey)
plumbum (2): to find inner peace in your wife - no wait, that's another dude (Derek)
ponzi (1): a reverse kamakazi pilot; he crashes his plane in such a way that it induces labor (Derek)
ponzi (2): to successfully shower before the porcupine gets REALLY jealous (Mitch)
poonac: a clever reversal of the failed McDonald's promotion "Happy Can O' Poop" to disguise the true contents of the meal (Dr. Fenkart)
poppism: p.o. – you smell
powsowdy: to reap the benefits of fascism in a monkey suit (Bryan)
princox: a succession of events that beings with an avalanche and ends with strawberry fritters (Derek)
prushun: what my Grandma used to call me after her untimely demise. Of course, I had to move her mouth and do the voice, but whatever, it's her (Bryan)
punty: a rodent very similar to a doric column (Kevin)