Earlier in history, the megapower known as Russia was feared by many as the country of the future; the sole possibility for the domination of the world. Then somewhere in the 90's they collapsed and began sprouting tiny little sub-nations that nobody can ever seem to remember the names of because they all sound vaguely like sneezes. One such republic, Ryzuzibcek, announced its departure from the former Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, as well as announcing special three-drink-for-one specials for tourists (as Ryzuzibcek's main form of income is from undrinkable vodka concoctions.) Ryzuzibcek's leader, George, publicly announced to a thronging mass of 18 people and a puppy that the new country under his jurisdiction would "quell the surrounding uprisings in those other republics as well as offer very nice accommodation, affordable eateries, and an historically accurate puppet-show explaining, in detail, how czar Ivan III earned the nickname 'Ivan the Terrible' (hint: it had to do with why he didn't produce a whole lot of heirs)"
Further in George's speech, he went on to name some of the governmental changes the new independent country would be taking on, since moving away from Russia but still grubbing off their government would, as he put it, 'sorta suck.' His first act as leader of the 84 square foot country was to add one more illustrious star to most maps: the capital city of Ryzuzibcek, Derek Sonderfan. Explaining that, as a country of 84 square feet, pretty much whoever happened to occupy the majority of it would subsequently be named the capital city. Derek Sonderfan, traditionally a United States native, happened to be in Ryzuzibcek at the time, was far and away fatter than any wayward Russians in the area, and was given the dubious title of 'capital city'. When asked how he felt, Derek responded, "I am currently six days late for my dentist appointment and I'm a little confused at this point."
Ryzuzibcek has already declared war on Uzbekistan, Switzerland, and an eight year old girl in Tulsa. The nation has instituted the "chumbucket" as the national currency.
Further in George's speech, he went on to name some of the governmental changes the new independent country would be taking on, since moving away from Russia but still grubbing off their government would, as he put it, 'sorta suck.' His first act as leader of the 84 square foot country was to add one more illustrious star to most maps: the capital city of Ryzuzibcek, Derek Sonderfan. Explaining that, as a country of 84 square feet, pretty much whoever happened to occupy the majority of it would subsequently be named the capital city. Derek Sonderfan, traditionally a United States native, happened to be in Ryzuzibcek at the time, was far and away fatter than any wayward Russians in the area, and was given the dubious title of 'capital city'. When asked how he felt, Derek responded, "I am currently six days late for my dentist appointment and I'm a little confused at this point."
Ryzuzibcek has already declared war on Uzbekistan, Switzerland, and an eight year old girl in Tulsa. The nation has instituted the "chumbucket" as the national currency.